Tips for managing difficult behaviours and interactions in the workplace

Difficulties in Working Relationships: Understand and Reverse The Negative Cycle

When we find ourselves becoming increasingly annoyed, upset or fearful around someone’s behaviour and attitude over an extended period of time, here’s what tends to happen for many people: 1. We start to have increasingly negative thoughts about that person/persons which in turn causes us to experience a greater level of unpleasant emotions such as…

What if someone persists in a behaviour despite your feedback?

You’ve asked them once, you’ve asked them a second time and yet the behaviour still keeps happening. How to address behaviour that persists despite your feedback about it. Transcript  Hi Mary Rafferty here Today I want to talk to you about a question that came up yesterday in a seminar I was delivering to a…

Trying to Manage a ‘Difficult’ Person: Are they Taking too much space in your head?

Does a person on your team sap everyone’s energy? Do you find yourself putting too much time and attention as a manager on their behaviours? Are you constantly listening to grumblings from others about them? When people come for coaching in these situations, they are usually looking for a list of strategies. How can they…

Relationships that Endlessly Frustrate: Can the Dynamic Be Changed?

“We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.” ~ Anaïs Nin The above quote neatly captures the psychological phenomenon, that while there is a factual and concrete reality out there, none of us have a truly objective view. There can be many different perceptions of the same situation. As an…

Frustrated trying to deal with difficult behaviour? Try these 3 simple shifts

Frustrated trying to deal with difficult behaviour? Imagine you had a magic weather wand. A simple wave and you would have glorious sunshine, a gentle breeze with a cloudless blue sky above. With your magic wand you would lighten people’s moods, you’d lift people’s energy and motivation. In one swoosh, you could banish the grey…

The Secret Ingredient for Success in Difficult Conversations

Does the thought of difficult conversations make your stomach churn? Here’s the most important ingredient to make it work. In a recent holiday in Italy I went on a ‘Try a Dive’ lesson. The dive centre was at a sandy beach next to a clear blue lagoon. The water looked so inviting and delicious. But…

Managing ‘Difficult’ Behaviour – Are You Walking on Eggshells?

‘All those ideas around conflict resolution are really great Mary, but what about ‘difficult behaviour’ – someone who just won’t sit down and talk things through in a reasonable way…how are you supposed to deal with them?’ This was the comment of a client in a recent team conflict case. She described herself as constantly…

Conversation gets a bit rocky? Switch to a ‘meta’-conversation

How often have you been in what starts as a fairly innocuous discussion or conversation but then find a divergence of views begins to send things down a rockier path? What you had expected to be a routine or even casual discussion moves slowly but steadily to a mini-debate and then progresses towards an argument.…